Achieve a Better Outlook on Life
Do you feel like you’ve been down in the dumps or had a negative attitude these days? Would you like to improve the way you’re currently viewing your life and your world? There are methods that you can use, in order to emulate others who always seem to be happier than you are. Let’s talk about some of these, and you can decide if you’d like to test them out to achieve a better outlook on life.
1. Make a list of people you have in your life on a regular basis. By each name, give them a score between -10 and +10 depending on how much they add to or deduct from your emotional well-being.
2. After reviewing the list, decide which people to see more of, and which to see less of – depending on who helps your attitude most. Look for those with a good disposition who don’t spend all their time with gossip and negativity.
3. Get a little exercise each day. Make this at least 5 minutes. You don’t need special equipment or a gym – just a carpet or mat and a few leg lifts, sit-ups, pushups, deep knee bends, etc. Don’t overdo. Add 1 minute per day until you reach 20 Minutes.
4. Call 1 friend each day, and share a positive thought with them. It can be something you’re dreaming about doing or a funny story you heard – or anything else that’s fun to tell.
5. Review the words you use when you speak or think about your goals and plans. Avoid words like should, shouldn’t, always, never, and “try”. Also avoid using the phrases “I can’t” or “yes, but” in your self talk, or to others. For example, when you get ready to make a change I your life, and you have done at least one step towards your goal – you are no longer trying, but actually “doing” something for yourself at that point.
6. What can you do about the past? Absolutely nothing can be changed back there! So why dwell on past incidents. Unless you are undergoing psychotherapy, dwelling on the past is an exercise that leads you down a path of depression. Ask yourself if you truly want to take that path.
7. Keep a list of three things you’d like to do for fun this week. Each time you do something fun, mark it off your list, and add a new one. Always keep 3 going at a time. “Looking forward” gives you hope and energy that does not exist in thoughts about the past.
8. If there are things you’d like to change in your life, take them 1-2 at a time. More than that will challenge you too much, and you’ll set yourself up for defeat. Also, make tasks small. If you tell yourself to get the apartment cleaned up, then be specific…and break the apartment into sections to do some on Mon/Wed/Fri and keep the weekend or off time for yourself to do more creative and restful things. If you keep telling yourself that there is ALWAYS (one of the bad words) something to do – then you’ll never have a real break to recharge and you’ll simply be immobilized.
9. Find a job that you like. If you don’t like the one you have, keep it while you find something you will like, and a boss who is easy to work with. If you are spending 8-12 hours a day in a situation you don’t like – what is that doing to your moods, outlook and attitude.
10. If you are depressed, get help. Often you’ll find that there is something you are tolerating which is making you very angry.
If you’d like to talk privately, about your specific situation or relationship problem, please set up some time and we can work together to tailor coping strategies that closely fit your goals and commitment level.
Warmest regards,
Dr. Judith L. Allen
1-888-693-8437 Ext. 01966126 when prompted
Ph.D.LPC.LMFT.RC.CMH
AAMFT.APMHA.ADCA.ISMHO