Do you have self confidence or are you just arrogant? In truth we are talking apples and oranges, although many might think these two issues are the same. I certainly believe that one must have a good dose of self confidence in order to be arrogant, but that is not always necessary. The primary difference between confident and arrogance is humility or (in the case of arrogance) the lack of humility.

Self confidence is our own personal belief in our ability to do things – our ability to move forward with action. A healthy self esteem, which is our ability to find value in our self, is key to a strong self confidence. If you’ve been complimented by others on certain aspects about yourself, you’ll find you will be building self esteem and thereby confidence. To be self confident means to be able to recognize your strengths, but also knowing you have weaknesses. If your good work goes unnoticed or if the compliments you receive are dismissed then this will work to destroy self esteem and confidence; or in a trickier way, arrogance may be borne.

Arrogance is one of the perfect shadow qualities. Arrogance usually requires self confidence, but it is over confidence and without any form of humility. Arrogance is; “you’re pretty and you KNOW you’re pretty”. This is also what you project to the world at large. Arrogance is usually closed off and unapproachable. Arrogance does not see the faults (except in other people). An arrogant person has great strengths but very few, if any, weaknesses in their own eyes. Few people want to be arrogant (rightfully so, in my opinion) so they shove that quality into their shadow bag and move on. Of course, as any shadow trait, arrogance will raise its ugly head more often that we might like.

So where is the gift (as in all shadow traits) in arrogance? Well, lets say you are on a project team, and no one wants to take the bull by the horns, and really step forward to get the ball rolling. Here is one place an arrogant person may be handy. They will get the job done, it may not be the most pleasant experience, but if they come in before deadline and under budget, the bonus you may get might make up for some unpleasantness. Arrogant people can be over-bearing and domineering, but they usually get the job done.

Build your self confidence - be all that you can be.

Love and Bright blessings ~ Richard