You've been with the same partner for 3 years (or months, 3 months or 30 years it makes no difference), and out of nowhere s/he gets ups and leaves. There’s been no sign of infidelity and there seems no reason the break up is occurring. All you know is that you are devastated. Then it comes… the infamous, “you did nothing wrong, I just need to find myself”. Why don’t they just lie and say they are in a long term affair, at least that way it’s easier to forget about the lost love. “Find your self?!” Where the hell did you get lost?!!

The fact is they entered into a relationship before they were ready. For what ever reason; comfort, convenience, money, housing, and the big one lust… they entered into a relationship and called it love. They actually believed it to BE love. And maybe in some way it was love. In the beginning they wanted it to love (not many are so callous to say it was for any of the other reasons listed above). So, they spend the months and years trying to convince themselves and YOU that they love you. They remake themselves over and over again so that the two of you can be a match. You love them so much, they don’t want to hurt you, but they are destined to do exactly that, and they know it.

They are not lost… they were never “found”. They have re-made themselves so much; they feel like a statue of Play-Doh. So, the next time someone dumps you because they need to go find themselves, you don’t need to be so heart broken. Realize the fact that your relationship was not built on a very sturdy foundation. We all know what happens when a building is not built on a good foundation.

Tell you what… it is the person that tells you, “I don’t want to start a relationship with you right now… I need to find myself”; THIS is the person you need to keep tabs with! Because if a relationship is possible with them… it will be founded in honesty.