“I need you”. Have you ever spoken those three words? Often they come before or after 3 other words; “I love you”. These six words together can be a dangerous combination. If you hear these six words coming from someone else, if I were you, I would stop and consider your situation.

Hollywood has created this beautiful romantic image of two people falling in love and "completing" each other. Today’s relationships are about being together, being one, and “… love is never about saying sorry …” or “You complete me” – It is beautiful, idealistic, it sells lots of movies, and it causes problems in our real relationships. It might as well be the line from Labyrinth; " Just fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave."
There is no such thing as an incomplete person needing to be completed by another. We are all complete; it’s just that some of us, in terms of self, are undiscovered. You want a good, healthy romantic line from Hollywood? Try this on for size from As Good as it Gets; “You make me want to be a better man.” Nothing about “completeing”… nothing about “needing”, only the desire to be better. We should seek love that first inspires us, not a love that first somehow makes us feel whole.

I’m not saying that it is impossible to love someone so completely that they seem to encompass the whole of your life, obviously that is possible. If such a relationship can work for you more power to you. But if you find yourself needing that from someone else - or giving that to someone else, I think you should check your motives.

I truly love what K. Gibran writes about marriage in The Prophet; “… Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. …”

So, complete yourself, and let your soulmate love that completeness. Let your soulmate till the soil of your soul so that you may grow. So that come harvet time you can give back to them abundently.

Love and Bright blessings ~ Richard